Last week, I hosted a LinkedIn event to talk about this topic. If you missed it, here’s a quick summary of the main points we discussed. (You can also watch it here.)

For years, companies have poured resources into learning and development, hoping that giving people access to great materials will spark real change. They assume that if people complete courses, watch videos, and earn certifications, new behaviors will just naturally follow.

But after spending more than a decade working with leaders and teams, my perspective has shifted.

That’s the myth of self-directed learning, and it’s a big reason why so many well-intentioned development programs quietly miss the mark.

Learning Isn’t the Goal. Behavior Is.

Most learning programs are measured by completion:

But those metrics tell us very little about what actually matters. What matters is how people behave, and behavior changes come from learning something new and having an opportunity to practice it. And, especially when the team practices together.

The gap between knowing and doing isn’t just about motivation, but rather it is a design problem with the way the learning was set up in the first place. 

Why Self-Directed Learning Falls Short

Self-directed learning assumes that insight leads to action. But human behavior doesn’t work that way.

Behavior change almost never happens alone. It’s social, shaped by our context, and deeply affected by the people around us. When learning is something you in your own time, or in your own head, it’s much less likely to stick.

Research backs this up. Findings from the American Society for Training & Development (now ATD) showed that:

• People have about a 10% chance of following through when they simply intend to change.
• That jumps to 65% when they have an accountability partner.
• And it reaches 95% when there is ongoing accountability and shared commitment.

Having another person involved makes a huge difference when it comes to changing habits because behavior change is a social process.

Experience (Not Information) Changes Behavior 

One of the most important insights I’ve learned is this:

Behavior doesn’t change because people learned something.

Behavior changes because people experienced something together.

When people learn with others, they are more likely to:

• Try new behaviors
• Stick with them longer
• Feel supported during discomfort
• Translate insight into action

This is where most traditional learning models fall apart. They prioritize consumption over connection, content over context, and information over experience. When the opposite is true! People shift perspective through dialogue not consumption, and nothing changes if people consume content and don’t have an opportunity to practice. 

The Role of Psychological Safety

If behavior change is social, then the environment matters just as much as the content.

Psychological safety is the belief that it’s safe to take interpersonal risks. And it is a prerequisite for learning that actually sticks. Google’s Project Aristotle famously found that psychological safety was the single most important factor in high-performing teams because learning requires vulnerability.

People won’t practice new behaviors if they fear judgment. They won’t speak honestly if mistakes feel dangerous. And they won’t experiment if failure comes with social consequences.

Psychological safety allows people to:

• Practice new behaviors without fear
• Admit what they don’t know
• Try, stumble, reflect, and try again

Without it, learning stays theoretical. With it, learning becomes transformational.

Dialogue vs. Discussion: A Critical Distinction

One of the most overlooked aspects of learning design is how people talk to each other.

Many learning environments default to discussion where people analyze, debate, break  ideas apart, and reach  conclusions. Discussion has its place, especially for decision-making. But it’s not the same as dialogue.

Dialogue comes from the Greek dia-logos, meaning “flow of meaning.”

It’s collaborative, open-ended, and focused on listening to understand.

Dialogue helps people:

• Explore different perspectives
• Create shared meaning
• Reflect together
• Communicate with one another instead of at one another

When self-directed learning is combined with good conversation, something meaningful happens. Rather than simply taking in ideas, people start to weave them into how they see themselves and their teams.

From “Did They Complete It?” to “Did They Show Up Differently?”

This is one of the most important mindset shifts for organizations.

Self-directed learning asks: Did they complete the course?

Team-based learning asks: Did they show up to work differently?

Those are harder questions to measure, but they’re the only ones that matter.

Why Teams, Not Individuals, Drive Change

Organizations often treat learning as an individual responsibility. But culture lives in relationships. Teams are where norms form.

Teams are where behaviors are reinforced.

Teams are where habits either stick or disappear.

When teams learn together, they develop:

• Shared language
• Mutual accountability
• Collective responsibility for growth

That’s how values move from posters on the wall into everyday behavior.

Designing Learning That Actually Works

So what does effective learning look like?

It looks like:

When these things come together, learning isn’t just something people complete. Learning becomes part of how they work and show up every day.

A Final Thought

We don’t need more content. We don’t need smarter courses. We don’t need another platform full of videos no one remembers. What we need are shared experiences that help people learn and grow at work alongside their team. 

It changes when teams evolve together.